Creating Sparks That Last & All Things Relationships

The Year of The Couple 2023 Is going to be The Year of The Couple.  Well, in my world anyway. Every now and then I embark on an experiment that’ll inject some torque into the engine that drives our relationships. And this time, it’s a blueprint, or plan of action, which I’ve called Romance and Wrinkles. Romance and Wrinkles Sign Up Form Join in for once-a-month emails from me.  Each month I’ll introduce an experience to enhance your perception of your partner for the better. Each experience will be face-to-face so you can observe each other closely: facial expressions, eye contact, emotional response. Don’t worry if this sounds intense, they are all fun, lighthearted and above-board engaging opportunities. To the best of my ability, they will also be screen-free. 💟 If you’re on the fence and would like to no more, please comment below. And if you prefer, there is also an email link on the sign-up form for questions. Tap the link ➡️  Find the sign-up form here: My husband and I will b

Relationship Habits for Greater Happiness I am so excited to introduce our guest blogger to you today! Cheri Timko is a Couples Relationship Expert who helps individuals strengthen their relationship with their current partner. Quoted from Cheri’s blog: Cheri Timko: A relationship habit is something built into our lives that we do automatically. That doesn't mean thoughtlessly. We still have to show up for that event.  The benefit of making these things habits is that we don't have to work so hard to come up with new ideas in order to connect with our partner - the opportunities to connect are already built into the relationship. You still need to show up with intention and emotion, but the opportunity is already there. Read the full article on her blog at the link below: 3 Relationship Habits for Greater Happiness Instagram Live with Cheri Timko I'm even more excited to tell you that we will get a chance to chat with Cheri on Instagram next week.  I have set a reminder on

 A Deeper Dive [I invite you to sit quietly, read and contemplate this resonant article by Guest Blogger Kate Jiggins] At this point in my life, I have two “jobs.” Job number one is a people helper. A listener. A psychotherapist. I have been sitting with people – witnessing their stories – for close to 20-years. Yikes! Sometimes it feels like I am just out of graduate school. Like a new puppy. Wide eyed. Enthusiastic. Image credit Canva My other “job”? I write. I tell stories about real life. Real people. Real struggles. Real triumph. Real inspiration. Stories that connect, support – hopefully inspire people to push themselves - explore what’s on the other side of that unhelpful conditioning. Limiting beliefs. Crappy stories. Those re-runs that keep us stuck.  Overtime, in my personal work, and my time with couples, I am beginning to see – more importantly understand - the power of story. Mine. Yours. Theirs. Others. It’s true, we all have unique stories. However, the big question is

And a Whole Lot of Living There she is! Introducing my book baby, which, just by the way, hit the No.1 Best Seller list in it's category on launch day! The category is One-Hour Relationships Short Reads ! That's it - in just one hour you could be on your way to a whole new way of life. Imagine how good that will be. You and your partner can be reading TONIGHT, together and start living your best lives as a couple madly, deeply in love. Grab your chance  HERE ! Wake Up Tomorrow Morning With a Clean Slate https://unsplash.com/@matheusferrero Here's how my book, Creating Sparks that Last,  has helped other couples just like you: Don’t you just LOVE that this reader is so inspired to create new sparks, new memories and renewed connection, in her marriage? I do! This next reader just blew me away with her enthusiasm for her husband to read the book: You’re just an hour away from living your romantic dream, and at just $.99c, I’d say that’s real value. Don’t delay:  Grab it today

How to Change Conversation Blockers https://unsplash.com/@jonathanborba One thing is for sure: Marriage and relationships take a lot of work; a lot of honesty with ourselves and our partners. Michelle Obama speaks openly on her anniversary with Barack. [This will be the last of our 4-part mini series on effective communication in relationships.  Keep a look out for our new series next week!]  Honesty with ourselves: Let's begin there If our partner says things that make us feel uncomfortable, we have to first examine what it feels like inside of us in order to understand why we feel that way. For example, "Are you going to dinner dressed like that?" A seemingly innocent question right? WRONG. It's an accusatory question and it makes you feel defensive. Great! Now you can start to understand why it makes you feel that way. You might have any number of reasons - they'll be personal to you as we're all so very different. When you've discovered why you feel a

 Body Language Speaks Volumes https://unsplash.com/@lawlesscapture "The first important point to realize is that only a small part of what you are communicating at any moment is coming from the actual words you are saying. There are three ways that we are constantly sending out messages to those around us:  body language, tone of voice and actual words." - Decoding Love by Andrew Trees I've done extensive research in the art of communicating, particularly with people who are emotionally vulnerable. To continue our communication thread, we'll look at a variety of ways we can be more receptive to our partners' needs and convey our message with more awareness and perhaps subtlety. In the book Decoding Love, Andrew Trees goes on to say, "In most casual conversations, what we say is the least important of the three aspects of communication."  Consider a conversation you're having with someone while they're checking their mobile phone. This is a tra

Dormant Feelings Can Be Re-Ignited You can also find new ways to feel by learning more about each other. To recap on last weeks’ post about honest and open vulnerability and making a commitment to the happiness of your relationship, I’ve got a few pointers below to steer the process in the right direction.  To learn a little more about your mate it’ll help to understand some of these ideas: Unique         🔸 What are your interests, individually and as a couple? Connect     🔸Physically and emotionally with eye contact Consistent     🔸 Commit ahead of time to a time frame that suits both your calendars for date events Vulnerability   🔸 Be prepared to talk of sensitive issues without fear of betrayal Laughter     🔸It really is the best medicine ; choose outings that tickle your funny bone I am not a marriage counsellor, I’m not even a relationship guide; what I am, is a wife. I have been a wife to the same man for 33 years. I won’t say always happily because that would b

Goals to Make Your Relationship Zing! Image credit @unsplash by @jonathansborba When James and I completed our Date Year Experiment, we came away with solid ideas of what we wanted our relationship to look like. We set goals to ensure that we got the very best outcome. I'll outline some of them here, along with additional ideas from practicalintimacy.com https://pin.it/1N7Qi1l 🔥 Know your boundaries and limitations:          ❣   As well as knowing your own boundaries and letting your partner figure out theirs, you also   need to know your limitations: own your faults, your shortcomings and areas of   required improvement. Don't try to dictate your partners' limitations to them, this is about you taking ownership of your own stuff. 🔥 Validate your own feelings and emotions:         ❣   Maintaining the status quo to keep the peace is not an option. Name your feelings, name your emotions without having to defend them. They just are  because that is what you're experienci