Creating Sparks That Last & All Things Relationships

A MARITAL TUNE-UP I am delighted to share today's blogpost with you from a reader who shares her findings on ways to 'create sparks that last' in her marriage. https://unsplash.com/@claudialam Although Stuart and I share a lot in common, we have come to learn from each other as well. From Stuart, his thoughtful and considerate ways. From me, my humor, laughter, and how to lighten up. April 15 th , 2022 marked our 39 th  wedding anniversary. Just. That. Fast. Both recently retired—not together; we read not to do it together—we became hyper-aware of a new phase in our lives and marriage. It was as though we were left holding a simmering love, one becoming all too familiar (Storge) instead of our once robust, romantic and physical love. Our minds and bodies were struggling with this shift: How to keep ‘us’ alive as we aged when it seemed we were on a fast track to becoming roommates. Stuart and I decided to seek counseling in order to make an immediate change in the direction ...

Dormant Feelings Can Be Re-Ignited You can also find new ways to feel by learning more about each other. To recap on last weeks’ post about honest and open vulnerability and making a commitment to the happiness of your relationship, I’ve got a few pointers below to steer the process in the right direction.  To learn a little more about your mate it’ll help to understand some of these ideas: Unique         🔸 What are your interests, individually and as a couple? Connect     🔸Physically and emotionally with eye contact Consistent     🔸 Commit ahead of time to a time frame that suits both your calendars for date events Vulnerability   🔸 Be prepared to talk of sensitive issues without fear of betrayal Laughter     🔸It really is the best medicine ; choose outings that tickle your funny bone I am not a marriage counsellor, I’m not even a relationship guide; what I am, is a wife. I have been ...

FIND YOUR UNIQUE SPARK Choose ways to ignite your relationship that make both of you happy Image credit @casey-horner via Unsplash ♥ Notice how I said ‘unique’?   There is no one size fits all to a relationship so don’t compare your relationship to anyone else’s.  Each one is a unique fit. I largely chose our dates myself for Date Year but I made sure to integrate James’ preferences as well. This is how our experiences became unique to us. I use words like ‘both’, ‘our’ and ‘us’ because marriage is exclusively about the two of you. Three’s a crowd, no doubt about it. We’re not talking about socializing, we’re talking about connecting. Your marriage needs to grow the two of you together so choose your date experiences wisely. ♥ Be consistent. Don’t let the inconvenience of everyday life get in the way of making a commitment to the happiness of your marriage.                     ...